Thank God for daily aches and pains

Oh my goodness have I been sick!!! Last Wednesday I went to lunch with a friend and when I got home I started feeling tired. Well let me start that over. I didn't want to get up Wednesday morning. I was so tired and I knew something wasn't right. I got up at 10:00 am and I wanted to stay in bed! Anyway, I knew I had lunch plans and I wanted to go. I sure didn't want to stay home it was beautiful outside. I went to lunch and told her my allergies were acting up and I needed some medicine. I took them, it seemed to help after awhile. Later that night I knew I was sick. Thursday when I got up I was so sick!! My throat was so swollen and sore I didn't know what was going on. So, anyway by 10:00 am I was going to the doctor, but I decided to try to treat it myself. I don't normally get sick like this so I thought it was a day or two thing. Well, all night Thursday I was running a high fever and chilling and sweating and literally miserable. My clothes and the covers were soaked with sweat, yet I was freezing. My throat was so swollen I was thinking what if I go to sleep and can't breathe. I woke up about 2:45 am and cast out that demon. I layed hands on my body and prayed for healing on every part of my body. Not just the sickness that was running through me at the time. If we don't have faith that God can heal us how can we believe He can heal others? Anyway, I went back to sleep and woke up- sick!! But, it did not detour my faith in MY God. He healed me along time ago at Calvary. I went to the doctor, got an antibiotic and I have been so sick since. The last time I ate was Wednesday at lunch, (maybe I've lost a pound or two :) I have drank milkshakes from Sonic. They are the only thing I could put in my mouth that didn't HURT. I have layed and watched TV so much that I no longer want to watch it, it is so boring. Delorne asked me yesterday after he got home from a family reunion that I couldn't go to if I had heard that Paul Newman died? I said Delorne, I have watched TV all day what do you think? He laughed. So I feel better now, not great , but better. So, what is the point of telling you all this? Let me go on.

After being sicker than I have been in along time, I had time to think about the pains I complain about everyday. I thanked God for them and still do. I would never want to live in pain like I have had for the last four days. There are people with major diseases that live in major pain every single day of their lives. Including children! I have prayed for these people and have felt for them in away I never did before. If they live with this every day, then who am I with my little backache and heal spurs etc... to complain? I promised God that when I got well I was changing my ways. I will no longer look at how bad I feel, but how grateful I am that I am not sick everyday. I can still cook, and clean, and go shopping, and have lunch with friends and come and go with my aches and pains. To be honest with you since I have been sick I haven't felt the other pains, they have been over shadowed by this sickness. When I am better they have to be over shadowed by my faith that God took care of them for me. I will live differently than before. If there are pains, I won't dwell on them like before. I thank God for what I have been through in the last few days. It opened my eyes to what I am supposed to do. I am not to dwell on the sickness in my body, it over shadows my whole being. Therefore; I can not be who I am to be as a Christian, wife, mother, friend, sister etc... I honestly have given so much of my life to the herniated disc in my back, and my neck, and lately the heal spurs that I have not been able to give God the time I need to. I concentrated on how bad I felt and used it as an excuse not to be able to do anything sometimes. There have been days when all I would do is one or two things and quit because I was letting the pain get me down, mentally more than physically at times. The bible says I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Phil 4:13. I wouldn't ask God to strengthen me I just gave in to the pain. That has to change. After this sickness I have come to realize that we can do more if we want to and do less if we want to. That includes doing what is best for our bodies so that they can get well. That could include exercise, eat right, change our habits that are bad, to habits that are good for us. And, that's what they are, habits that we have grown accustomed to. We have grown lazy to sit and watch TV rather than get up exercise or do something that is good for us. Call a friend and go to lunch, find a hobby and do it. Find someone who needs help and help them, turn off the TV or the computer and get up and go.

Change your eating habits to get well, lose weight, and feel better. This is one of my goals. I know I need to change my food. I don't eat right, and I don't eat enough. Therefore; my metabolism is out of whack and I can't lose weight. I have exercised for a year with a friend and not lost weight. I have toned up and strengthened my body, but not lost weight. Last year I could barely do one push up now it's no problem to do 25 or 30. I can see the differences, just imagine if I had been eating right to! I know what I have to do for me, do you know what you have to do for you? Quit making excuses and change your habits. If you don't change then don't complain. The bible says what we speak about we bring about, so we need to speak what is good for us and not the negative things. Think about how many times you say I don't feel good or this hurts or I'm so sick. Every day we speak these things over us and don't even realize what we are doing. Just imagine if you were always saying how good you feel instead of the opposite. It would change your mind on how to deal with it if nothing else. We give so much time to the aches and pains that they take over, and I have been a queen in this area. After all I have real aches, and they hurt. But, I also talk about them everyday, to myself if not someone else. It's a habit. Oh well, this strep throat has made me realize what true pain is. I do not have a pain that needs so much devotion as I have given them in the last 20 years. My devotion is going in a positive direction. I am going to do something about it and not sit and mope about it anymore. The light bulb has come on and I thank God it did.

Pray for me, I need those prayers, Uylonda

Tempted and Tried

I was wondering if I'm being tested by God today. In the last week there have been things happen that I never would of thought about at one time, let alone them all happening in the same week. I know God is seeing how I'm going to handle it when other people need me to help them. And as soon as you take a step and say I'm ready willing and able Lord, He gives it to you! I think I handled it well with His help. I have been thanked over and over by those I helped, and they were in a crisis. None of them are related or know one another either. That is how it goes. I literally asked God, why? I said God, I can handle one crisis and am willing to help them, but God three! They have all calmed down now, and I'm thankful they have.

I also have reconnected with some friends that I haven't talked to in a while. I had lunch with one today, it was nice. We needed it. Don't think that people are to busy for you. Give them a call and let them know that your not to busy for them either! In my daily devotional (last week no less), it said to reconnect with a friend. That was scary in a way. My friend has been through a lot in the last little bit, but she was trying to reconnect with me to. So I just did it and we talked on the phone for an hour and forty minutes, just like we used to. But God moves things for us when He wants us to move. He wanted to see how I would handle a crisis and I handled them with love. I wasn't selfish with my time. I just did it. I'm not bragging on me, I'm bragging on God. He has changed me into someone I didn't use to be. I would always help someone, but wish at the same time I didn't have to! I always wanted to be like my husband in this area. He goes at the drop of a hat if someone calls and needs him. I was glad he would, because I didn't have to!! Sounds awful, but it's true. Thank God those days are gone. God is doing all this to get us into position to be in ministry for Him. It amazes me how much I want to do this. I pray for things to do for God. I tell Him that I have so much time to do His work, would He please give me some. I want to work for Him daily.

There is only one way that He will use you though. And that is through obedience to His word. He says pray, read, and study to show yourself approved. I love to read, it's one of my most favorite things to do. I love to write as well! I write about what I have studied or read, or even about things I have heard from God about. He will talk to you if you spend time with Him. It is awesome when He does! He doesn't always say a lot, sometimes just one word, but when He does it's powerful.

Anyway, I wasn't planing on writing today, but I was put to another test and I had to write. It helps me. Pray for me and my family, we truly need it. When you step up for God, the devil attacks in ways you can't imagine! He is NOT going to win, God is in control.

Be Blessed, Uylonda

Walk the talk you talk

Well, I have come a long way since the 15th of this month. God has changed me already. I learned alot that day. We truly have to pay attention to how we talk, not only the words we speak, but the tone in which we say them. I am learning how to change it everyday. I learned a lot from my mother in this area. She is the only person I have ever known to truly change how she talked to people. (She went to Heaven July 13th, 1996.) When we were growing up she talked mean to us even if she didn't mean to. Sounds funny, but it's true. Her tone of voice was so mean that I was afraid of her at times. I never knew if she was being mean or mad, or what. As I grew up it caused me to be angry at her. She didn't know how to articulate her words. She had one tone and it was grouchy. I would stay away from her when I could. Not, that she was mean to me, but I honestly never knew if she was really mad or not. I grew up the same way! I learned from her how to talk to people. I just didn't pay any attention to how I was perceived by people. It just wasn't something I would do. But, their were so many people who told me I didn't have to sound so mean, or mad. This in turn would make me mad because I wasn't mad! What a tangled web we weave.

I was talking to my stepmother yesterday and she was talking about my niece who is 2. She is adorable, and my 18 year old daughter was saying something to her, and she said Halley don't be mean. My step mother said we have to watch how we talk to children, they grow up and talk just like we talked to them. My heart hurt because I knew I had done to my daughter what my mother had done to me. What a web we are weaving! I pray that my children will not let the way I talked to them do to their lives what was done to me.

I love my mother more today than I did when she was alive. I have grown so much since her death because of my children. I now know what she went through. I also know that she was never taught by anyone any other way to talk or how to treat people. But, in the years before she died she changed. She became loving to everyone, and everyone loved her. God changed her when she asked Him to. She was so kind and sweet that I want to be just like her. She let God change her heart and that changed her tone and attitude, and I have a great example in her. If I can only have what she had and talk to people the way she did, I will be happy. She had a way about her that everyone, strangers and family and friends knew she truly cared. She loved everyone and they knew it. What a legacy to leave behind. I truly miss her and wish that I could tell her how she changed me. She would be so happy to hear her child say ( I want to be like you.)

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me!! Oh yes they can, they can destroy you from the inside out. Learn how to listen to the tone of your voice and how people perceive you. It can truly be an eye opening experience.

God Bless you, Uylonda

Am I mean or just sound like it?

Lord empty me of any selfish pride so I can be more like you. I started this blog after reading Angie's in Bring the Rain about losing her baby. I knew she was helping others in ways she may never know. I have not lost a child, but I have had alot of pain in my life that has been taken away by my father in heaven. I know that I can help others as well. But, I am still learning that there are still things I have not dealt with. Just yesterday I learned that I still am angry. I'm sorry Lord. Please empty me of all that stands in your way of using me the way you want to. It hurts me to know that I show people a side of me that I don't want to. I want that part of me gone. I thought it was. But, there was someone who was strong enough to let me know that I am mean! I don't mean to be and I don't know that I'm sounding that way. It's just the way I talk. But, at the same time it's not. I have to deal with (ME) and find out why I'm sounding like I'm still angry at everyone. God is so awesome. He lets us know even what we don't want to know. It hurts to have to deal with the fact that people think I'm grouchy and mean. I honestly don't feel that way inside. But, apparently I am still dealing with it somewhere, or not dealing with it. God is getting ready to use me and my husband in an awesome way, and I have to be whole. He let me know that I need to purge myself of a pride that says I'm going to get you before you get me. So, I sound mean the way I talk, not meaning to, but still doing so. This makes people think I don't like them and I don't care. This is just a tool of the enemy, Satan. I have to have a heart of compassion to do the work I've been called into. With my voice the way it is now it seems as if I'm not compassionate. But, I am. So, God called me on it. I havc to change this and get rid of that which is in me that is not of God. A grouchy spirit is not of Him. We are called to have the fruit of the spirit which is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. If we live in the Sprit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Galatians 5:22-26 We are to be like Him. How can we show who He is if we are not walking like Him? He is love, and I have to show that love. I do love everyone, even those who have hurt me. I have compassion for them. My job is to show God's love for mankind so they will want to know Him. Saying I'm happy and in love with the Lord, but being grouchy, people will not want what I have. I'm sorry Father, forgive me. Thank you Lord for showing me what I need to change about myself.

Changing ourselves is the hardest thing to do. It is getting rid of self. The flesh doesn't want to do what is right and good, but the spirit does. We have to look at ourself, and what we do that is not pleasing to the Lord. Looking at yourself hurts. You will cry, I have cried since yesterday. It hurts me that I hurt my Lord. I have asked His forgiveness and I am changing what is in me that causes me to seem like I'm mean.

Gotta go now, see you later Uylonda